Alice in alternia
by ATMhomestuckstalker
Summary: two friends find themselves dragged into a fight on an entirely different world when a grey rabbit in a tailcoat pissed kanaya off. now they must find a way home and put a stop to this war, but why is everyone calling them alice? and in the end...will they want to leave?
1. Chapter 1

alice in alternia character roles

alice/s:kanaya: That Rabbit Will Pay For Its Rudeness tavros:uHMM I'M NOT SURE IF IT'S SUCH A GOOD IDEA.

mad hatter: gamzee: YoU ReAdY FoR SoMe MoThErFuCkInG tEa~iTs FaYgO FlAvOuReD HoNk!

caterpillar: aradia: its hard t0 say wh0 y0u are n0w but it will bec0me clear soon 0_0

Cheshire dragon: terezi: why 4r3 you 4sk1ng m3 for d1r3ct1ons?  
c4n't you s33 1m bl1nd? H3H3H3

Tweedledee/dumb: sollux and eridan: he 2tarted iit. i did not sol!

white rabbit: karkat: CAN YOU NOOK SNIFFERS NOT SEE THAT I AM LATE!

march cat: nepeta: ac purrpares to have some tea with her furriend!

dorm mouse: equius: i may be small but i asure you i am quite STRONG!

white queen: feferi:glub! dont you fink thats a bit mean 38(

blue queen: vriska:I SA8D TO PA8NT THEM BLUUUUUUUUE!

card soldiers: drones: obey, submit, obey,submit

a wind to guide you:john egbert:hello i'm here to be your guide!

a light to guide you: rose lalond: i am here to help you on your way :)

singing flowers:jade harley/dave strider: ooooh lets sing lets sing! kay but imma rap a little a'ight?

THE BEGINNING:  
two friends had been together in their garden having a tea party.  
when suddenly tavros the younger heard something from one of the bushes and so they investigated kanaya the older of the two and being the braver one approached the bush first and at first glance saw only a grey rabbit so she picked it up when suddenly it started yelling at her!  
"HEY YOU NOOK SNIFFING F**kA** CAN'T YOU SEE I'M LATE ENOUGH AS IT ALREADY IS!"  
after his rude out burst he kicked kanayas hand and jumped onto tavros's head and started running towards a large rabbit hole.  
kanaya not being one to take such talk picked up her fathers chainsaw and began chasing after the rude grey rabbit with tavros close behind before she could catch the rude thing it had jumped down the hole and so kanaya stopped still furious. but tavros had lost his footing and tripped pushing kanaya and himself into the hole.

as they fell they could see the hole turn from dirt and roots to metal cogs clocks and streams of fabric. they just couldn't believe their eyes as even they began changing.  
their skin turned grey their eyes turned yellow and then horns appeared atop their heads as they were looking around at changing scenery they looked down and noticed ground quickly approaching and so they both let out screams as if it would save them and then they landed but strangely what appeared to be a wooden floor was actually inflated an so they landed softly at least they did until the chainsaw landed popping it once they got up they started looking around the room kanaya spotted a tiny door and a drink sitting on a table so she walked towards it feeling thirsty where as tavros had seen a small plate of cookies and approached that feeling hungry once at each end of the room they saw notes one said "drink me!" and the other "EAT ME!" and next to each was a key. kanaya knowing better picked the key up placing it in a pocket on her dress while tavros just ate a cookie soon regretting it as he suddenly grew bigger and bigger "uhm KANAYA CAN YOU uH HELP?"

kanaya turned around at his booming voice eyes wide and asked "How Did You Do This?!"  
tavros then explained that all he did was eat a cookie she thought about this and told him to place one on the ground by the tiny door and take a sip of the drink so he did he then started to shrink smaller than kanaya so she took a sip as well shrinking to his size and so they walked over to the once tiny door now perfect for their size in hopes that the key she pocketed is for this door "perhaps we will find a way back home through here" "uH MAYBE..."  
she proceeds to place the key into the door and turns...*CLICK*  
"phew" the two friends sighed with relief they opend the door and looked out to there surprise everything was gigantic "...i guess its a good thing i told you to put the cookie on the ground"  
we would not wish to be so sma-" she had almost finished her sentence when suddenly the door slammed behind her knocking them out of the room and onto their butts *oWW THAT REALLY HURT* "indeed that did what caused the door to slam so viol-"  
once again she was interrupted this time by voices bickering in the distance so they decided to investigate what they found was quite strange indeed. two boys with grey skin and horns stood in clothes opposite to each others one wearing a white t shirt with a black spade and the other in a black t shirt with a white heart bickering about where the alices would arrive, wanting to know what an alice was kanaya and tavros approached the two "ii 2ay their gonna come outta the room other there!" "wwell i say their gonna show up at the rivver!"  
"you're ju2t 2ayiing that 2o you can go for a 2wiim" "excuse me but may i ask as to what an alice is?"  
both of the boys turned towards kanaya and tavros and simultaneously shouted "YOU ARE!"  
befor going back to their fight for about 15 seconds before realizing who was standing next to them.  
"AHH WWE'VE GOTTA TELL THE BLUE QUEEN!""NO WE TELL THE FUSCIA QUEEN!" then they both ran of in separate directions

"tHAT WAS uhm sTRANGE""indeed it was very strange and apparently we are what they call Alice's?"  
are y0u n0w? y0u d0n't seem quite sure of it RIBBIT w00ps""well of course im not certa- WAIT who's there! come out!"  
i am already 0ut this is a forest where c0uld i be in? and if not an alice wh0 c0uld y0u be?" "kanaya"  
are y0u certain?" a small flying red caterpillar spoke into her ear making her side step and fall over "what on earth are you?!"  
kanaya said frantically trying to pull herself up "n0t 0n earth...""excuse me?""y0u said what 0n earth we're n0t 0n earth"  
t-then where pray tell me are we" kanaya asked sceptically with a hint of concern "alternia of c0urse, and i am a grub but grub is not my name no...my name is aradia, h0w am i certain 0f this? i was b0rn with this name alice""can you stop calling me alice it is not my name my name is kanaya it is the name i was born with and it is the name i shall stick with""are you certain 0f that?""certain of what"  
"are y0u certain that is the name y0u were b0rn with, were y0u there?""o-of course i was there! it was my birth"  
"h0w d0 y0u kn0w? can y0u remember it?""of course not i was just born!""then h0w d0 y0u kn0w if y0u are n0t s0me one else? i can remember my birth it was a warm sum-""please stop! i do not wish to hear this! can you please just tell us why they call us alice?""uH yEAH WHY IS THAT?"  
because it is who you are""we're not-""untill y0u are able t0 pr0ve me wr0ng...lets make a bet...the two of you shall go on a journey and at the end of said journey i will call y0u b0th by what y0u pr0ve t0 be-RIBBIT w00ps" the grub i mean aradia said smiling "fine you have yourself a deal" kanaya said putting her hand out to shake on it before thinking she is just a tiny grub how could sh-  
kanayas train of thoughts was cut short as a small grub leg latched onto her pinky and began shaking it vigorously "deal" aradia said before fluttering back and pointing to a direction just off to the left where an entrance into a forest began "g0 there and the Cheshire drag0n will help y0u begin the j0urney!" as the duo walked over entering the forest path they heard aradias voice calling out good luck in her strange cheery robotic voice


	2. Chapter 2

as they continued on into the woods they noticed the thicket of brush grow darker and darker until they were practically blind as bats!

kanaya started calling out to find out if anyone was there who could help "Hello? Is anyone here? Aradia told us you could help!" "WHY 1F 1T 1SN'T TH3 GR34T 4L1C3S!...1T'S 4BOUT T1M3" :/  
they looked up to find a tree suddenly illuminated and a peeved dragon sitting upon a branch "Oh my goodness, you're a dragon!" kanaya gasped out "R34LLY? 1 COULDN'T T3LL H3H3H3H3"  
"uHMM COULD YOU MAYBE, hELP US OUT? wE NEED TO FIND OUR WAY SO UHM WHICH WAY SHOULD WE GO?"  
"WHY WOULD YOU 4SK M3? YOU 4R3 SO RUD3 C4NT YOU TELL 1'M BL1ND M1ST3R BULLHORN 4L1C3 H4H4H4H4"  
as the dragon continued it's laughter two paths were lit up "B3FOR3 YOU 4R3 TWO CHO1C3S BOTH C4N L34D YOU TO YOUR D3ST1NY BUT TH3 OUTCOM3 SH4LL D1FF3R GR34TLY CHOOS3 W1S3LY FOR TH1S SH4LL B3 YOUR F4T3"  
the two friends looked to one another thinking over their choices both paths seemed relatively the same and she said BOTH lead to their destiny so doesn't that mean that they would meet back up at the end?

"We've decided to take separate paths" kanaya said with new resolve "uH KANAYA ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THIS?" tavros was worried about his friends decision what if one got lost?  
"I'ts okay tavros look" she held up two chalk sticks "We can leave our mark and make our way back if it leads to a dead end or unwanted destination, besides i believe in you pupa!" she even used their old nickname to make him feel better which worked as he took a deep breath and stepped forward to grab his chalk they both walked over to separate entrances said their good byes/lucks and finally entered the maze of forest ahead unbeknownst to the both that a certain dragon had a love for chalk and could not resist trailing the two each leaving not a trace behind of which way to go leaving them as blind as she to the results of their bravery

tavros had noticed as he walked that it seemed like the wind was following him pushing him along almost playfully which after a while of walking decided to run with the winds currents to see where it could lead him, though not forgetting to leave an X on some of the trees he'd pass he could hear a tune up ahead and followed the sounds to a lit meadow with flowers seemingly dancing with the wind or...not so seemingly as he got closer he saw that they were in fact dancing and singing for two particularly large ones at the center singing it was odd one of the flowers was singing a beautiful ballad whilst the other was rapping but he couldn't help but think it fit...  
as the song ended he started clapping which got him the attention of the meadows inhabitants and mind you being pushed forward by a rose hurts!  
"well well! you're an odd flower! haha what are you?" the green one asked him as the red one seemed to fold its leaves and nod at him looking as if to be sizing him up "uHH I DON'T...I I'M NOT A FLOWER I'M A PERSON UH TAV-" the green flower gasped "YOU'RE ALICE?! AHHHHH" Tavros was taken aback by the reaction it was a mortified yet...happy reaction which to him was a pretty odd mix... "uHH SO YOU'VE HEARD ABOUT ME?"  
the red flower finally spoke up "yeah what's it to you? but i heard there were two john did you lie?" the wind seemed to flow by ruffling the petals of the flowers "eh okay well mister "not alice" alice to get by you have to beat one of us in a sing off your choice, you a rapper or balladette?" "dave that's not even a real word!"  
so the red one was dave...and whose john? "oh! how rude! i am jade this is dave and you've met john. you're Tablet?" the wind made a sort of snickering sound when he realized "uHH WAIT THE WIND IS A PERSON?! aND IT'S umm tAVROS" the winds laughter intensified until he could swear he heard an actual voice "silly of course the wind is a person everyone in wonderland has a life" "unless your a tea junkie" "DAVE don't be rude hatter is a nice guy, odd but nice!" "We're getting off track, rap time!"

with kanaya as she walked along she noticed a small light always just ahead seeming to guide her she thought it was beautiful... and as she focused on it she could swear she saw the outlines of a girl around her age before the light was to much to look at despite it being a kind warm glow it was still bright as the sun she didn't really know why she'd just follow a strange light but...it felt right to and so she did in the distance she heard laughter and loud chatter which seemed to be where her little light was headed. she blushed at her thoughts...calling the light hers how silly she made it to a clearing with a lit table and around it mismatching chairs some even just crates or over turned buckets and although this was strange the patrons of said table took the cake...or tea of craziness at this little party sugar cubes were being thrown into the air landing into floating cups as two figures danced around the table and a stern looking mouse watched from a cup as she stepped closer she seemed to have garnered the others attention as the tall unruly one in a large top hat suddenly fell over with a honk before staring grinning at her "ac sees a lovely alice had decided to join! would you like some tea the fierce lioness shouts with glee!" the younger looking one who looked part cat bounded towards her grabbing her hand to lead her to the table "Uhhm my name is Kanaya but well i suppose a small tea party wouldn't hurt"  
she was wrong...a mad hatter tea party was never small and as she sat confused as to why the tea never stayed in a single cup once being poured understanding now why they were dancing around grabbing at the different cups this was the oddest tea party she had been to...but she found it quite fun "So LiTtLe MiSsY rOsEy LeAd ThE wAy FoR yA hUh?"  
she remembered the light that brought her here looking around to find it seemed to be waiting off to the side smiling at it she was about to reply when a familiar grey blur bounded forward


End file.
